Last night was a hard night for us and our 5 year old. A constant battle. Her trying to prove she's the boss, and us showing her she's not. The basic theme of the issues last night were wrapped around her wanting to be social and with friends all the time instead of family, throwing fits, and talking back.
I don't think I ever realized how hard this parenting thing was going to be. I knew in the beginning the lack of sleep and learning new schedules was challenging, but it wasn't hard. Last night was hard. She cried. I cried. Addy cried, and she wasn't even involved!
A mix of emotions flooded over me. I could remember me at a younger age going through things like this with my mom. I wanted to deal with Lil like my mom dealt with me. I wish I had a little video camera I could rewind back to 1981 and see what she said.
Being a mom has given me a clearer understanding of how much God truly loves each of us. How much he puts up with. It's exactly what I dealt with last night! How many times I try to be boss and He shows me I am not. How many times I pick my friends and doing fun this instead of spending time becoming closer to Him. How many times I talk in a way that isn't pleasing to Him or glorifying Him.
God I pray for the strength to be the kind of mom you intended me to be. To listen to you, to respect you, to glorify you. Thank you for giving me the blessing of motherhood. Thank you for showing me you are in control. Thank you for loving me.
6 comments:
That is so powerful. It's not easy sometimes, huh? Those girls are so blessed to have you as their mom.
Those days are hard!!!!
I think it is important to remember that is is better to have those now (or starting having them now) than when they are 13. If you don't lay the foundation now, there is no point in trying later.
Hang in there. We'll all survive. Our parents did.
That is very well put! Sorry you had such a hard night! You are a wonderful mom and unfortunately one day they will be 13 :) Then 16:)I too wish I could see what my mom did! Take a mommy break! We all deserve it from time to time. You should have been a writer. YOu put things in such great words!!!
I have to agree w/ Nicole, you have a way w/ words! Everything you wrote is so true! Even w/ boy's. You could always take up writing, in addition to being a mom,working mom, wife,walker,blogger, and I'm sure there is more :)
Amen, sista. It is so much harder than I thought and I fail sometimes at being the Mom I should be. Some how I bet my Mom felt that same way some days and honestly, all I can remember of her is the good stuff. So there is hope.
Oh, and to your comment...who knows when we will visit Edmond next. We are flying to Kansas for Thanksgiving. We would love to see you soon too, but you know how hectic life is sometimes. We will make up there one of these days and plan a little reunion! I will never forget the time you had us over for dinner and you made the yummy ice cream sandwich dessert and then we saw a mouse. :-) I think there were some girly screams going on. Good times!
I needed to hear all that this morning. Kadence is only 3 and we are dealing with this on some level. Your prayer at the end gave me the strength to make it through today!!
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