January 28, 2011

World's Suckiest Mom.

Last night I was cleaning out a cabinet. (Nothing good ever comes from cleaning.) My sweet 4 year old found a scrapbook. A REAL scrapbook. With pictures, trinkets, glue, goodies, stickers, adorable paper, cutouts, and sweet notes....all about her OLDER SISTER.

She ooo'd and awww'd and then said, "Mommy, where's my book like this!?"

I started to sweat. Quick, think fast. I could lie..."honey, there was a fire, a flood, the dog ate it"...but I didn't lie. "Mommy has it started, it's in my closet." She rushed to my closet. Oh I've got it started all right. Her name is written in it.

She ran to her dad. "My book like sissy's isn't started, it only has my name." (I suck.)

My sweet husband tried to bail me out, "Well mom is going to do it, you know when she did your sisters? When you were born. So Lily was almost 3 years old, so see...moms not that far behind with yours." (I don't feel like he's helping me at this point, I can feel the sarcasm. She's broken. I've caused this pain. Then "his help" gets worse.) "Do you want to help mommy do it? Cut the paper and pick things out to go in your book?" Her eyes light up, and she yells, "YES!" GREAT, now I'm behind on this scrapbook, and have a full time project manager to dictate my every movement.

I've GOT to get her 1st year book done, so she'll always have it. They will both have one book that I actually spent time cutting & creating. Then after that, it's printed blogs for me. Someday when my kids feel let down and think they have the suckiest mom in the world that never documented anything in their lives, I'll be able to say..."look girls, look....Mommy blogged, SEE - I do CARE!"

January 6, 2011

Easy Bake = Pain in my...

...well, you know.

The American Girl doll marketing people are just flat out genius.

Those Play-Doh guys keep coming up with new and inventive ways for us to squish and mold that junk into fun, cool shapes.

Crayola, they're no dummies. Things get old, they just make-up a new color......who doesn't want to color with some jazzberry jam & mango tango!?

But these Easy Bake people are down-right crooked I tell ya, crooked.

Santa brought an Easy Bake oven to our house this year. Santa probably shouldn't get up at 2:40 AM the morning after Thanksgiving and go shop for toys for kids. He makes quick decisions and doesn't take time to think thru what he's doing!

After we searched over town to find the correct 100 watt bulb for the device the stirring and spraying and pouring and scrapping and waiting and asking "is it ready yet?" began.

Oh they were proud. They loved it. Couldn't get enough. I, however, had enough seconds after I opened the box.

The cakes on the box look normal. They look large enough to share with your sister, but they're not. You have to make two cakes. Mixes that cost $6.99 for a kit. Crooked. (Betty Crocker cake mix, Wal-Mart $.97 box. A full cake, enough cake to feed your sister, your neighbor, your neighbors sister, plus some.)

They were slightly thrilled. Lily's eye was twitching with excitement!

Delish. I have never seen Rachel Ray licking the palm of her hand in the middle of her cooking show. We need to continue to work on etiquette, I see.

But, giiiirrrl, you gotta try this cake...it's the bomb. Fo' shizzle! (Yes, I had to look up fo' shizzle in the Urban Dictionary.)